When Enough is Enough

Two weeks ago, I moved into a community residence for mentally ill clients. I'm waiting for a space in the apartment program, which is 3 women sharing a house, doing their own thing, with a case manager visiting once a week to check up on things like meds and finances. Meanwhile, though, I'm cohabiting with 9 other people, who function independently to a greater or lesser degree. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm on the higher functioning end of the scale. I don't need help with my Activities of Daily Living (ADL's), like showering daily, brushing your teeth, managing your money, things like that. There are other people that need help with ALL that. And that's okay - we can't all be in the same place at the same time.

I do have a problem, though, and I don't really know how to solve it. One of the women here, who happens to be one of my roommates, is someone who has lived on the streets for most of her adult life. I'd seen her regularly at the soup kitchens and shelters where I volunteered - she generally opted to sleep outside than in the shelter because she wanted her "stuff" (her shopping cart) with her. When I saw her here, I was so glad, so happy that she'd gotten treatment and moved off the street. She was still a little rough around the edges, and now she's on oxygen for emphysema (but she still smokes 2 packs a day) but, you know, I figured it takes time to settle down in a new environment.

Then I found out she's been here a year.

The woman doesn't shower unless there's a big blow up, bi-weekly, with the staff. She doesn't do her laundry. She sleeps in her clothes then gets up and wears them all day. I have yet to see her change her bed linens. She smokes at night in the upstairs bathroom (which is 2 doors from my bedroom where the oxygen tank is and I do not want my face blown off thank you). She has two cartons of cigarettes but will pick stubs out of the ash trays. She is basically a hot mess and if she's getting better, I cannot imagine why she was allowed here a year ago, because I cannot imagine what she was living like then.

It's not my place to say anything to her about this, but the smell coming from her side of the room is killing me. I spend more money on air freshener than I do on mascara. I know she goes through my stuff when I'm not home, which is a lot of the time. And I've gone to staff, and they've told me they're working on it.

I'm writing this, not to make fun, but to seriously ask for suggestions on how to fix this problem. I like it here. I feel safe, it's not disgusting like sober houses are, and I have the opportunity to really start my life over. And I know I will always have to be around people that I don't mesh with. And she's really nice, but she's so manipulative. She doesn't do her chore. She never cooks (which is good, considering her hygiene, but I end up picking up her nights and I get home late and want to chill).

So, any thoughts would be appreciated. You can leave comments at the bottom of this post. Thanks, you guys.